A little over a year ago I decided to start diving into deep introspection with the hope of becoming a better person. The journey has been riveting and rewarding, but it will never end. This fact makes me happy, motivates me, and opens new paths and opportunities. I’ll never be perfect, or claim to be perfect, but the attempt to get there is worth it in my opinion. The fact that I will never be perfect is what allows me to savor today’s moments. I know that it’s all part of the process.
Over my short 32 years I’ve stumbled about and gathered tid-bits of information when and where I could, yet I didn’t start making sense of the information I was collecting. The time has come to change that, and to put into practice some of my learnings. Through, mentors, books, classes, and experiences I’ve collected various points of view to help me narrow my focus. These will evolve and optimize over time, I hope, but the foundation is true. I lay them out below to stay transparent in my motives and accountable for my actions. I ask that you help me stay true to this reality. Really, I’m a huge advocate of tough love, and I appreciate the feedback without hesitation.
I’ve determined my Needs, Wants, and Like-To-Haves for life and for a life-partner. Also, I found the most logical path to Success I could find and set a Mission (from the words of Ray Dalio and the class of Aubrey Marcus). I then set my Principles, Values, and Tactics and found useful ways to Communicate and for Leading. Finally, I worked on exercises To-Do in intimate relationships.
I’ve put the results on an Excel sheet (here: MyPerson ) and printed it so that I can review it every day while I go through my morning disciplines. You can also click on the link and download it if you would like to do this exercise yourself. It is important to me to constantly remind, evaluate, and execute what I’ve laid out here. (and, no, I didn’t do a spell check on the Excel sheet, so please forgive my brain)
It will be difficult to see the spreadsheet unless you pull it up from the link above (MyPerson) or zoom into the above picture, so I’ve broken up the sections below.
My Mission: To relay joy, love, and enrichment, while enjoying them myself.
Needs (as the 6 pillars of human needs), Wants, and Would-Like-to-Haves. Where meaningful work and relationships (are also Needs in my opinion), are determined by my mission and values. So, in other words, meaningful work and relationships center on building a community that savors relaying joy, love, and enrichment.
The following method of success is the most concise, and understandable by my humble brain, and how I hope to reach systematic goals. The words in parenthesis are active thought processes and actions for going through the 5-step process.
|Systems/Goals (Higher level thinking, Synthesis, Visualization, Prioritization)|
|Identify & Don’t Tolerate Problems (Perception, Intolerance of Badness, Synthesis)|
|Diagnose to Root Cause (Hyper logical, holistic)|
|Design a Plan for Eliminating the Problems (Visualization, Proactivity, Creativity)|
|Do What is Set Out in Plan (Self Discipline, Good work habits, Results orientation, Proactivity)|
I’ve determined Principles that I see as most important to live by, my Values, and have laid out some Tactics to maximize my efficiency/effectiveness in being productive for staying true to everything said above so far.
Below I’ve listed some tactics and principles of Communication and Leadership that vibrate with me – some new to me and some old, but all forms of what I want to be able to use whenever the right moment calls.
I did the same exercise for Needs/Wants/Likes in a mate as well, but I realized that I do not ‘need’ anything other than air every 3 minutes and water every 3 days and food every 3 weeks. So, once again, I’ve updated and adjusted, and hell, I’ll list them too. I had some interesting feedback on this and will touch on it soon.
Last year I took the Go For Your Win class by Aubrey Marcus. It was an awesome experience and I learned a lot. One of the great things about it was this section where you picture what your WIN is. I encourage you to go through the exercise below for a quick tour:
–“Take 10 deep breaths. In for a count of seven. Out for a count of 7. This will take 2 minutes and 20 seconds. When you are finished start a journal entry from the future. Date the page at some point in the future, 1 year ahead, 3 years, 5 years, whatever. And then start the first line with “My life is as good as it could possibly be…” Then describe all the aspects of your life in this future world you are living. Include everything you did that day as well.”–
–“This is the final snapshot of your win. You should be able to see all elements of your win exemplified in this journal entry; Mission, Vocation, Passion, Connection, Vibration. Now that you know what your win looks, feels, smells, and tastes like–you will start to make all the little micro decisions necessary to get you there. You are on your way. You are winning.”–
This is my ideal life in the form of a journal entry on a day in the future:
–Today was a great day! I woke early, had morning sex after going through my morning routine; supplementing, stretching, heavy workout, long hot shower (heat treatment), cold rinse off shower (Wim Hoff breathing), and drinking tea while journaling. The woman I’m married to, who is kind and loving, my best friend, passionate about her endeavors, healthy, smart and well traveled, was up for getting down and dirty, and I almost had to shower again, but I like carrying the sex scent along with me. We ate breakfast as a family (eggs, bacon, veggies, coffee w/ mct oil, and butter); the kids were bright, clever, and inquisitive as their mornings got started – excited to work on their missions. I dropped them off at school and we hugged our goodbyes with love. I went to the office and met with the business’ leaders to look over updates/reports/issues and make decisions on how to move forward and grow the team’s culture of joy, love, and enrichment. I was there until noon working and left to meet a savage/legend for lunch. We talked about how to become the best in any field and what drove him/her to reach their status; I vigorously took notes and invited them to my podcast. They agreed and we planned one for the future. At 1PM I went to the studio and practiced drums and worked on the new album with the band until 3 PM. After which I did a podcast with a couple community leaders and we discussed the projects going on in the city; how they were coming along, the methods and insights used, the personnel etc. At 4PM I left the studio and stopped by one of the businesses I was fortunate enough to be responsible for, to make sure all the employees were doing well; had high moral, were pleased with their work/situation/impact/future, their families were in good shape, and their health was great. At 5PM I left and headed for home – family dinner. We ate wild steaks and veggies – between the lady who decided to spend her life with me as a partner and myself I say we made a great team; cooking included. She had picked up the kids, and through dinner, we talked about what we had experienced so far throughout the day, what was coming up, what we learned, and gave each other feedback. After dinner, we played with the kids and started them on homework. At 7PM I met some friends in the entertainment room for watching/analyzing/coaching some rugby. Some days at 7PM I go to train martial arts to work on my protective skills; or go to the range for target practice. At 9PM I started to read and journal. We ended up falling asleep after holding each other for a while. I dreamt about our weekly trips to the beach and how fun it was going to be to build sand castles, play sports, swim, and surf this coming weekend.–
If you’ve read all this I appreciate it. Again, I’d like to reiterate that these are things I’m going to be constantly working on, and if I don’t hold the line in any aspect of the above topics, please give me some tough love. I’ll get after it.